Your view on Boobs

One of the great things about the Internet, is that it has allowed me to make friends with people from all over the world. When you share a common bond like infertility you make some really deep friendships, or at least I do. They probably hate me back. Not caring.

What I find so cool is that I get an insight into cultures that are totally different to mine. The American culture has always amused me, and I don’t mean that in a disparaging way, it’s just, well interesting.

Here in South Africa we have a very interesting mix of cultures. A real melting pot. Or as the cliché goes, a rainbow nation. Because we were colonized by the British and their friends, we speak British English. It is colour, not color. Flavour. Programme. Enterprise. And it’s 19 July 2004. Not July19, 2004. We also have a more British sense of humour (humor) than American. But we are less uptight than the British and we are better lovers. (joke)

And candy = sweets, biscuit = roll, cookie = biscuit. Fries = chips.

All in all a challenge when I write my blog because I have to translate my posts to American English. Thank god I am so clever.

But enough about that.

The reason for my post. You are wondering what boobs have to do with American culture.

Well, a post on another board today reminded me of a question I wanted to ask my American friends.

The girl on the other board posted something like this: (I say something like because as you know I never read any thing properly). Apparently she noticed that a guest of her neighbour (neighbor – this is getting annoying) was tanning topless in the neighbour’s garden. Apparently if you looked over or through the fence you could see the woman’s boobs. The girl on the board was so outraged and offended that she called the police to come and tell the woman to put her top back on. It really upset her.

I am amazed. In fact I am probably more amused. Who cares? I couldn’t care less if my neighbour tanned topless. My friends do it all the time on the beach.

It was the same thing with Janet Jackson’s boob. Apparently most of America was totally outraged, morally offended and in some cases even traumatized to witness a 3 second flash of a boob. With a nipple cap on. It’s a boob!!! We’ve all seen them and 50% of us have them.

I am probably missing something here, and I realize it could be a cultural difference thing, but I honestly don’t get the outrage at seeing boobs.

Is it really such a big thing there? Would my dear American friends get upset if their neighbour tanned topless?

I hope I don’t get a million google hits from acne’d teenagers looking for pictures of boobs.

Comments

[Christina]

I'm thinking it's more of a personal thing than a cultural thing. At least it is for most people. I personally could care less who's breasts are shown during a football game and how my neighbor decides to tan. :p (Unless of course they were tanning topless in the communal backyard our apartment copmlex has and then I'd be concerned about my husband spending a bit too much time out there with the dog.)

[DMouse007]

I've never got it either. It's just a boob. And what you do in your own back garden is your own damn business!

I'm from the UK, but going to the States in 11 days. I'm dying to whip my top off on the beach and see how many people have an apopleptic fit!

[Skylara]

Not sure why I'm leaving a comment when you just said in your other post that you don't read them. ;-)

Anyhow, the problem with America is that breasts have been heavily eroticized. Instead of being mainly baby bottles, with a side benefit of being "funbags" they are seen as a sex organ.

And the damn Puritanical Pilgrims started it!

Ahem, anyhow, there are numerous articles in the press about women getting kicked out of establishments for breastfeeding their children in public. Sad, hmm?

America has some definite hangups. And it took a long time for them to get put into place. I do see improvement, but it's sparse. So it will probably take a long time for America to get over its hang ups.

C'est la vie.

[Martie]

Hi Tertia

Can you still remember in the "old" South Africa (apartheid era) when the Scope had to put stars over the nipples of the models in the pictures, but bare black breasts were often seen on TV because bare breasts in African cultures were acceptable? That was quite funny.

You could also add the follwing words to your list:
apartment = flat, pacifier = dummy, estrogen = oestrogen, diarrhea = diarrhoea, pediatrician = paediatrician, napkin = serviette, diaper = nappy, Pack & Play = Camping Cot (I think), Crib = Cot, and so on and so forth. It took me some time to get used to the U.S. way of saying & spelling.

Have a nice week & good luck for Thursday!! You're in my thoughts every day!

[Dawn]

Let me just state for the record that the majority of people here in the states did not care one bit about Janet's boob. All the controversery (as seems to be the case a lot these days here) was stirred up by a small minority of extreme bible-thumpers, who for some reason have great influence over our bible-thumping president. This is one big reason I hope he is not re-elected in November.

As for me, I was actually watching the GAME and not Janet's boob, as I am from New England and we had a championship at stake! Anyways, it wasn't a big deal, but it was turned into one and it is absolutely ridiculous.

[Bridgette]

I could care less about exposed boobs. Hell, mine are hanging out all the time. Some people are just way to uptight. I personally can't imagine living like that. I actually know a woman who was married over 30 years, and never let her DH see her naked! Mine saw me naked within the first 30 days.

I missed the whole Janet Jackson thing, so I looked it up on the internet. I can't believe people were claiming to be traumatized by that. I must really be screwing up my kids then.

[Linda]

No, no, no. The boob itself is fine to show anytime, anywhere. It's the NIPPLE that cause such controversy.

The Janet Jackson thing was a load of bunk.

[Tracy]

Like Dawn said, most of us in the U.S. don't give a rat's ass about our neighbor's boobs, let alone Janet Jackson's. We're the silent majority.

[Julia]

I don't care either. Aside from perhaps suffering from boob-envy. Definitely didn't get offended by Janet, and would never EVER call the cops on a sunning neighbor.

I think the rest of the world gets a strange view on the US through the media. So often our own media makes a big fuss over stuff no one cares about and then skips completely over stuff we do (hello, March for Women's Lives).

Anyhoo, feel free to flash us whenever the urge takes you.

[Lisa]

The only thing I would care about my neighbor tanning topless is that my husband my break his neck using the ladder to get up on the roof for a better view.

[Lauren]

Well I know what post you are talking about and I couldn't reply to it since I thought what was the big deal? If it bothered her so much she could have just approached them instead of getting so hot and bothered about it.

I don't see a problem with it but in America ir probably needs to be done in the privacy of a backyard with a fence so as not to offend the conservatives. I see no problem at all with a boob hanging out and think there are far worse things for a child to see than a naked breast.

Lauren

[Cris]

*lurker*
Okay, my husband and I (Americans) went to St. Croix and I was on the beach *gasp* TOPLESS *gasp* and you should have seen some of the faces from the other Americans from our cruise ship....priceless.
I mean, there was full on nudity on this beach and I could have cared less. Don't like it, don't look, or better yet, don't go!
It's just NUDITY and people get so bent out of shape about it. Geez.
BTW, I love love love your blog.

[Blue]

I'm with the silent majority who couldn't give a rat's arse about Janet's boob. Actually, I was rather sick and tired of hearing about it.
The problem is when the thing that offends you is the constant *whining* by the conservatives. You don't get much time on the news for NOT being offended by something.

[Andreah]

I enjoyed seeing her boob while it was happening. I thought, "Whoa! Cool! Justing Timberlake is hot and totally just ripped off Janets top! COOL!" Only later did I find out it was a hug deal and wasn't supposed to happen (yeah right) who cares!

Watching the evening news is more repulsive than anyones boob.

[Square]

Okay, I admit it - I'm a conservative. I'm not a bible thumper, but I am a member of the "Vast, right-wing, conspiracy."

I don't want to be controversial, but here's my opinion, for what it's worth.

I think it's a privacy issue. I'm not offended by seeing someone's boobs but I don't really want to see them in my back yard. If I go to a beach where it's appropriate to be topless then I make that choice to go there or not. But don't I have a right to privacy in my back yard? I would not have called the police. I would be the one probably to put up a fence. I think you have a right to show whatever body parts you want in your own garden as long as you aren't making it a public display.

I think of it like someone who plays their music really loud. If it's coming into my yard or home then you aren't being courteous. Even if it's music that I like, you're being disrespectful by assuming that I won't mind or not caring. Even if I'm not offended by the boobs, then someone is being disrespectful if they assume that I'm not offended. They should assume that someone would be offended because both of these things are against the law.

Maybe the culture and laws regarding nudity should change but until it does - I'm offended when someone breaks the law - not the boobs themselves. I want to have my garden for my own boobs, not someone elses.

I know - I'm very conservative! I really don't want to annoy anyone. In my 20's I would have loved to sunbathe topless and anyone who would have cared, I would have said that they had big hang-ups. So now I'm the one with the hang-ups.

[Marla]

We were at a comedy club last Sat. night. The comedian said, "It's about time a young boy could molest a Jackson." Okay, we were drinking and it was funny at the time.

I agree it's a cultural thing. Micro culture. Some liberals were upset by the Boob, too. So, it depends on where you live, etc. etc. If the neighbour lived in Utah, then yeah, a boob must wear a berka.

I think the States falls somewhere inbetween France and Saudi Araba in regards to the boob.

[StacyG]

I AM SO SURPRISED!!! Not about a boob, but that I had no idea you were in South Africa!! I personally dont want to see anothers boobs. Just like I dont want to listen to certain types of music. Its just my preference. I dont go to nude beaches because I dont want to see it. But if others do, more power to them.

[Jo]

Oh, Amurrica.

See, boobs are okay to show IF and ONLY IF they are being used to sell something, in a sexy fashion. Cars, computers, food products, clothing. You may suggest a nipple the size of a thumb, but not show it unswathed. Everything else is fair game.

However, when boobs are being used for baby-feeding or tanning or nothing at all, really, then they become the province of The Devil. At least most states have laws in place protecting the right of a woman to feed her baby anywhere, even if she has to fight off legions of the ignorant to do so in peace. Sunbathing, you're pretty much screwed if you have a nosy parker neighbor.

So yeah. America is a house divided against itself when it comes to the hooters. I for one don't give a hoot (heh). They're a working body part, like elbows and toes.

[Coralie]

I couldn't care less if Janet Jackson or anyone else wants to expose a nipple or a breast. What I found offensive was the lead-up to the "wardrobe malfunction". I don't think that one needs to be a raging feminist to be offended by what was a public act of sexual violence.
Rather, I am disturbed that the media hoopla was (nearly) all about the nipple, while completely ignoring that the act that led to the "wardrobe malfunction" was by definition violent, demeaning and disturbing to many of us who had the misfortune to see it.

[Sherry]

Boobs. Tits. Jugs. Hooters.

Call them what you may, but why on EARTH breasts are so erotic and/or offensive to some people is just beyond me.

Being a woman who has been well endowed since the 3rd grade, and now sports a 38DD set of knockers, I can tell you that most Americans are so damn uptight that even the sight of cleavage sends them into a titty tizzy.

They're just boobs, people. BOOBS!

[Joanne]

There's definitely a hang-up about boobs here in the US...but I think it's no different than any other arbitrary cultural taboo (e.g., many cultures who have no problem with bare breasts object to bare penises). All human cultures have these silly, illogical quirks, I think.

I also think hang-ups about nudity vary greatly depending on where you are in the country...acceptable behavior in South Beach, Florida probably bears little resemblance to acceptable behavior in Salt Lake City, Utah. Because each state is a separate governmental entity, makes its own laws and in some senses, has its own culture, it's all over the map (heh, literally).

Finally, I think our media people live for a frenzy -- I don't think most people really care. I know I don't -- bring on the nudity!

[Tracy]

<< I think of it like someone who plays their music really loud. If it's coming into my yard or home then you aren't being courteous.>>

Now this is something that drives me crazy, but I wouldn't compare it to the boobage, because I just don't have to look. But music is different - I can't just "turn my ears away."

But more importantly, I have to know what this post is that Tertia didn't read! Someone please fill me in!

[Joanne]

There's definitely a hang-up about boobs here in the US...but I think it's no different than any other arbitrary cultural taboo (e.g., many cultures who have no problem with bare breasts object to bare penises). All human cultures have these silly, illogical quirks, I think.

I also think hang-ups about nudity vary greatly depending on where you are in the country...acceptable behavior in South Beach, Florida probably bears little resemblance to acceptable behavior in Salt Lake City, Utah. Because each state is a separate governmental entity, makes its own laws and in some senses, has its own culture, it's all over the map (heh, literally).

Finally, I think our media people live for a frenzy -- I don't think most people really care. I know I don't -- bring on the nudity!

[Anne]

The thing that drives me crazy about this whole incident is the topless guest was in her friend’s backyard minding her own business and the neighbor looked through or over the fence and got a peek so she calls the cops. If I were the topless guest I would have turned around and pressed peeping-Tom charges, but then again I’m feeling a tad bit hormonal = very irritable.

America certainly does have some strange hang-ups about boobies, sex, and violence. Sure use sex (tits included) and violence to sell everything but god forbid we give up our guns and violence and treat sex and nudity as something natural and beautiful.

[jc]

Did anyone ask her why she was peeking over and through her neighbour's fence? Does she look in their windows too?

Going topless has a valuable purpose - it shows boys and men what real boobs look like, as opposed to the implanted, airbrushed, pushed prodded and padded Victoria's Secret girls.

[Sky]

Tertia reads everything. She knows all. Bow to Tertia.

I though, am an idiot. I misread another post of hers and thought she didn't read comments. And she does!! I got an email that proves it! I framed it and everything! (ok, just kidding)

So consider yourself filled in, Tracy. :-)

[OliviaDrab]

The difficulty here in America is not that we are majority offended. The issue is that the few who ARE offended rule the country. Because if 5% shrivels their nose at something, the other 95% backtracks and does as much as possible to apologize and "correct" the issue. The offended control the country. Ask any man who watches the Super Bowl regularly and I am sure that deep down, he wishes ALL sporting even half-times would involve female nudity.

[Jo]

Oh yeah, was going to mention to creepy-rapey aspect of the Justin&Janet thing. And yeah, like Coralie said, nobody in the mainstream media said one word about it.

Ick.

[Danae]

Tertia, there are more boobs in The States than you could possibly imagine.

[R]

I am also an American, but I am living in Europe. The differences are amazing at times. I feel, honestly, that American's make such a big deal out of boobs that it gives it a "rebellious" aspect. I mean, really... what'st he big deal? I also think that a lot of people in the younger generations are more openminded to acceptance as opposed to the "prude" attitudes of our parents and prior generations.

[patricia]

I thought the reaction to the superbowl breast exposure was emabarassing on many levels, not the least of which is that while the networks got criticized for the "indecency' of a bare boob, noone mentioned the continuous bumping and grinding that the dancers enacted during the performance. When is a breast more suggestive than fucking motions?

Anyways, you've got to remember the early American settlers were puritans, and we still seem to have some of their blood flowing through the country today.

[Tracy]

To me, the most astonishing thing is the number of people who complained that their children were exposed to nudity on television. As if the umpteen minutes of bumping and grinding that preceeded the flash were appropriate for kids? It's not like one of the Wiggles exposed himself in mid-concert... if your child was injured by seeing Janet's nipple, they were certainly injured by the entire tawdry half-time show.

[cheryl b.]

It's not like Janet has gross boobs or anything, I don't know why people are having such a fit about it. I've had people act like I'm a freak for having nursed Xavier 'till he was 19 months old.I nursed him in public all the time, and while I never cared about my boobs showing I always made sure my tummy was covered.

[RainbowW]

it's that our a good segment of our puritannical culture is dominated by bible-thumping jesus freaks who were brain damaged at rebirth. this is the backlash against the more liberal part of our culture that sees nothing wrong with having sex in public.

pick your posion. there is no middle of the road anymore. at least not where i live (in a place where failure to believe in jesus is a great reason to get the holy living shit beat out of you).

let alone wander around your back yard with your boobs hanging out.

[Sanorah]

I grew up in a (very) conservative home in Oklahoma, USA.

BUT…I must admit, I like breast, tits, cahoonas, coconuts, melons, fun-bags, jugs, racks, boobs. (one of many interests I have in common with my man.) They are my favorite part of MY body.. and what I usually admire on other women as well. I never consider myself properly hooched-up unless I’m sporting at a good 4 inches of cleavage! I have spent time in the public spas in Asia where women share showers/hot tubs/saunas/ steam rooms in complete undress. I wouldn’t go topless on a beach because frankly I’m fat and I would be embarrassed… not of showing my breast, but that to be topless would require me to leave my pudgy tummy exposed as well. So I guess what I mean to say is.. if you wana show your stuff then have at it. If my husband spends to much time admiring them.. I’ll just bop him on the head.

(BTW.. i accidently posted this to Leery Polyp first... blush)

[Leslie]

I live in Northern California. The ONLY thing that bothered me about Janet Jackson's breast on TV was that she pretended it was an accident, when it was obviously planned down to a "T". If folks want to sunbathe au naturel in the privacy of their fenced backyards,(they are not exposing themselves...to see them you either have to look through or over the fence, or climb up on the roof) I say go for it. I absolutely LOATHE people who spend their time peeping through the fence at the neighbors!

[Laura]

Here in Minnesota we generally don't have fences between yards, so if my 50 year-old neighbor went topless it would be impossible for me to avoid the sight. Would I be surprised as hell to see her out there topless? Yes. Would I call the cops or be offended? No. Would I prefer NOT to see her specific boobs? OK, maybe. First I'd call over DH and say, "Honey, you gotta see this!" He'd break out the binoculars for a better look; we'd laugh. Then I'd punch him and take the binoculars away. We'd make immature boob jokes the rest of the day. But we're just immature boobs ourselves, so no biggie.

[Erin]

I am a 21 year old, female, American college student who is working on a project for my "Mass Media and it's Affects on the Human Condition" class. After reading all of the comments on breasts. I had to make a comment myself. I have to agree that the 2 second flash was no big deal. On the news a child can watch a man be blown away but to show something natural is an outrage. Only a small percentage of American's were really upset, the rest went on about their business. But don't you think by still talking about it and making comments about it that we are only prolonging its effects and giving the news a reason to continue debating about it. I say we all get over it already and stop giving everyone so much press. She did it as a stunt to premote her new album. As your publicist would say Bad press is still Good press.

[karen]

whats wrong with letting your boobs out? i sunbath all the time naked whether it be on a beach or in my garden, i really don't see why people get so easily offended!

[courtney]

i'm only 18 and i've got every thing i'll ever want nice titties 6 boyfriends and tones of clothes

[roy]

Just found this, but going to add it to favorites. As a male grown up in the u.s.a., I do admire the female form and love to just look, as I would to a truley lovely rose. As a nudist I do not understand this controversy over the human body. We all see the whole thing sooner or later. I have read that psychologists have done studies on children raised as nudists and non-nudists(textiles). The nudists were much more accepting of thier own skin. The textiles were more embarassed and thinking thier bodies ugly. I hope that more people get over this nudity aversion. There are so many things to worry about that are more important. The one thing nobody has mentioned is that the little nipple episode let the conservatives grab more control over what you watch and say in the u.s.a.

[Alexis]

I for one never cared about boobs. Yes i have them. Who cares. My housemate and I talk about them in front of my husband all the time. I don't get offended and neither should any one else. If I want to lay out topless in my ouwn backyard then I will. If you are looking then don't because I could call the cops on you and then they would label you the pervert not me.

By the way I love your blog. I just started reading it. Thanks

[Brandon]

First of all I'm from Michigan thats right in the good ole states as you people overseas insist on calling it. It is an issue of law like it was said earlier, but as with all countries laws take time to change. It is true that America is younger than most of you civilized countries in Europe but it is also true that some of you'r laws need to be updated also. With that I dont understand why people especially form other countries feel the need to voice their opinions for wich it first of all wasnt asked for and second they have no say (translation they cant do a damn thing about it) yet they feel the need to voice anyways. So why dont you outsiders concentrate on your own short comings.

[penis enlargement]

Three phrases should be among the most common in our daily usage. They are: Thank you, I am grateful and I appreciate.

[steve b the english chap]

boobs...ahhhhhhhh i love em !!!!