« Donor Egg IVF South Africa | Main | Mother Frequency »


Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

Nothing I can say about the lack of warm coverings (been there, done that) or the germ-infested mall (hate malls, avoid them like the plague, because you never know where the plague might appear) but must say, CANNOT POSSIBLY be today's contestant for WWM Award because you GOT OUT OF THE HOUSE. Any time the mother of month-old babies gets herself out of the house and introduces her children to something new, she is automatically enrolled in the "doing pretty darn well, thank you very much" club and exempt from the daily WWM Award nominations.

Because wow, you are really doing pretty darn well, my dear!

Shortly after I was born, my mom decided to take me to the mall. This was in Chicago, in the winter. Our shopping went fine, but by the time she left a blizzard had LITERALLY descended on the city. On top of that, the battery in her car was dead, so she had a 3 week old child outside in a snow storm. She said she would go up to people, crying, with this little baby, and ask them to jump her car, and they would actually say "I'm not going to do that with MY car!".

Eventually she found a nice man who helped, but for the time I spent in the cold, a mere snowflake among snowflakes, I think you still have a ways to go to beat her out.

Really, Tertia. You're wonderful. You're doing a great job, and I'm sorry people aren't working with you. You're great. Excellent mother. Just keep saying it to remind yourself.

Oh Tertia, this is too funny, it reminds me of my first mall outings!!! All of mine threw up, one on the car ride there, one in the mall and one on the way home!! They were starving and I was crying!! (It still kind of happens this way even now!)

BTW, my 2 girls hands/feet/legs still turn blue when cold (my boy's does not.) The PED says it is from immature circulation and they are fine. That sometimes they may turn blue and not be cold. Check with your doctor about that, mine were 14 weeks premature so I'm guessing that may be why they still have it at 16 mos old.

You're definitely a great mom!! And venture out when you can. Getting around with the babies will make you much more sane!!


Tertia- You are an amazing Mother to even venture out with 4week old twins. Definitely not WWM. The mall can be a very scary place even with one baby. I always worried about people breathing on my preemie.

I got my own WWM award -- graciously given to me by my father and other relatives -- because we kept our house so cold. My son's a January baby, too, and where I live January is winter, and that particular January was miserably, bitterly cold. We kept our house at about 62 degrees (fahrenheit, sorry, I am clueless about celcius), and every visitor told me that my child was going to DIE from the cold, even though he was dressed in fleecy outfits and swaddled in two layers of blankets. However, my Moscow-born and raised mother-in-law assured me that cold is GOOD for babies. Makes baby strong! Strong like Russian!

Later that year my next-door neighbor yelled at me for taking my baby out in the SUN. "Cover that baby!" she screamed. When you've got "WWM" tattooed on your forehead, you can't do anything right.

Congratulations on managing your first outing. I think you did an amazing job, to survive an hour in the mall!

Any parents who venture out w two month old babies deserve a BRAVERY award and that's it. My God, I've seen people fretting over their new coats, worn outside for the first time, can't imagine the fear for 2 tiny fledglings. The air con in such places still kills me every time, VERY EVIL THINGS.

Wait until you take them to the grocery store for the first time!!

It was very brave of you to take them to the mall; I literally didn't leave the house for the first 7 weeks. I hope your next experience is better. You're doing a great job.

Not the world's worst mother at all. I've had to buy blankets while out more than once because I realized that I had totally underdressed my babies. Wasn't it good to get out, even with all the diseases floating in the air? At least it is not RSV season, and people are not filled with cold germs. If they were born in the Northern Hemisphere, everyone would be coughing and sneezing and wiping their noses with their bare hands and then trying to touch the babies. My preemie girls were born December 30, and it was freezing, but I really was the worst mother, because I took them out all the time. I went insane stuck in the house all the time.

I live in a city, so no malls. I took my babies out for walks in the open air, and sat way in the back of restaurants at off hours when they weren't crowded. But I remember visiting my mother and going to the mall. It really is a scary place.

I received my WWM award after a mall trip too. I drove all the way home with my lovely 2 month old in her little saftey carrier which was clicked into the base which was tightly seatbelted into the car... except that I had forgotten I hadn't belted her back into her seat after I had taken her out in in the mall for a feeding. If I had been in an accident, the carseat would have been safe, but she would have gone flying out!

It happens and thank goodness there is no real damage. You're very brave to take them both out, I'm sure next time you go out you'll be over-prepared, bringing something more akin to a suitcase than a diaper bag.

You are not the worst mom ever. I took my 5 day old to the mall in winter- because I had no clothes for her. Too superstitous to buy before hand. We were there two hours with everyone saying "how old is she?" I finally just got so I told them Child Protective Services phone number and said "call." And it was DECEMBER. I was an idiot.

You are not the worst mom ever. I took my 5 day old to the mall in winter- because I had no clothes for her. Too superstitous to buy before hand. We were there two hours with everyone saying "how old is she?" I finally just got so I told them Child Protective Services phone number and said "call." And it was DECEMBER. I was an idiot.

Ok, you win the award but ONLY if WWM stands for WORLD'S WONDERFULEST MOTHER!

LOL I'm sorry but you make me laugh! I had my dd out at 6 days of age at Walmart of all places (against my mother's wishes.) DD is almost 9 so I guess it didn't hurt her. You're babies will be fine, it's us parents who become nervous wrecks out of hidden dangers!

Imagine the money you'll save.

Tertia - you're not the world's worst mother, you're not even a bad momma. You're divine and the rest of us know it even if you don't. You got out of the house, with the babies and you all survived. Whoever mentioned the poor circulation is probably right. Also she who said you fit in the category of "we're doing just fine, thank you" she's right too.

Tertia, you are as brave and wonderful as everyone tells you! I wish I'd known about the scariness of malls mixed with new babies. Back when my son ate approximately every three minutes and we measured his age in weeks, I made the mistake of trying to shop at a department store. My husband and I were tooling around on the second floor when Drew got hungry. "I'll take him and find somewhere to feed him," I said, "You keep shopping..." I left my jacket on the back of the stroller and took Drew out of his snowsuit, and proceeded to try to find my way through the labyrinth to the ladies' changing room with a screaming tot in my arms. I'm pretty sure everyone in the store stared at me as I raced around, convinced I was absconding with someone's child. Then I had to wait in line for a changing room, and no one offered to let me go ahead.

I hope the water is warming up, it wont be long now :)

You are beautiful and divine, and so are those babies. I'm sure they are absolutely fine, and mom was probably worse off than them :-). I think every new mom feels like that. :-)

It's a scary, scary world when you have little ones. And those "grabbing germ covered hands of old grannies"? I don't know how many times I've wanted to scream, "STOP TOUCHING MY CHILDREN" to germ-ridden strangers at the mall or the grocery store. I mean, it's COLD AND FLU SEASON, for crying out loud! HANDS OFF!

Malls are scary, even under the best of circumstances. But fear not. It's not cold/flu season over there. If Kate still has eye crusties tomorrow you might want to call her ped. and see if she needs drops, but it's probably no big deal. My daughter has had eye crusties off and on all her life.

You're not the worst mother ever. I've still got you beat there. Check out my resume:

Age 7 mos: Left baby alone in Boppy pillow on sofa. Baby suddenly learned how to escape Boppy. Rolled out, head hits table. Screams. Off to Emergency. (no damage, except to my nerves--God's first free pass to me)

Age 15 mos: twisted ankle while carrying precious baby down street and fell; baby's head hit pavement. Called pediatric office from cell phone (in tears) and deduced that there was no immediate reason to go to hospital. No damage (God's second free pass to me). 10 years off my life in one fell swoop.

Unfortunately, no one tells you how many free passes you get. But they are surprisingly resilient little things.

You are NOT the WWM, unless as state above it means "World's Wonderfullest Mom".

Malls are evil.....but I can top the horror stories. My son was 6 months old, not sitting up perfectly, but doing pretty good. The daycare had a photographer come in for pictures, so naturally I lined up.

The idiot sat him in a basket (it was fall...cute idea, but No.) and told me Not to Brace him - my hand would be in the picture.

Being a horrible Mom, I did as she told me...she tried to get his attention, and started flapping a folder in the air. He followed it with his eyes...and his head...and right after she snapped the picture, he fell out of the basket, off the table, and smashed his head on the concrete floor.

I was told the rooms down the hall heard the bang. *sigh* The doctor rushed him into X-ray...he's now almost 5 and perfectly normal (however normal a 5 year old male is, that is..)

Don't fret - you are doing great!

Stop trying to usurp my crown. I have court papers that say I'm the world's worst mother.

You're a wonderful mother. And I think you're so brave for going out with two small babies into a mall. And let's face it, people are stupid and go out when they're sick and they shouldn't.

I have a boss who's come to work every day for the last month even though he's had the flu and is only starting to get better now.

My son was born during a cold snap (-30C) and I took him out to the mall. I don't drive, so it meant bundling him up, and then bundling him into the stroller, walking to the train station, taking the train to the mall, unbundling the poor sweating kid, shopping for all of 3 minutes, bundling him back up, going back on the train and going home.

He lived, I lived, but boy was his father mad at me. Whatever.

I think you're a wonderful mother.

I shan't discuss why it is that I am actually the WWM; until I have a private blog, I can't risk the repercussions of detailing my infractions!

Oh, yes, sweet memories. 6 month baby crawls off water bed and dives to floor, head hitting THUD. Sister, exact same age, does truly spectacular somersault off of couch lands on head THUD. They really are resilient...4 year old, wanted bed rails off bed, fell from sleigh bed onto hardwood floor face first the other week THUD...lip looked great in 24 hours.

I simply can't wait until the childfree folks find these posts and comments.

Forget WWM. You deserve an award just for getting out of the house! Yay, Tertia!

The eye crusties? If they don't go away they could be from a blocked tear duct. No big deal, keep it clean, blah blah blah. All three of my boys had that, but it cleared up in a few months. If it doesn't clear up on it's own by one year, the doc can manually open it up - again, no big deal. When my firstborn started gooping at the eyes, I was sure I'd broken him. I just KNEW it was because of the time he'd peed in his face when I was changing his diaper, and now he'd go blind and being the inept mother I was, I wouldn't even find the right school for the blind or learn braille or code his shampoo bottles so he could shower on his own...
Yeah. Like that. I think WWM thoughts are a part of the fourth trimester. That and telling your birth story and obsessing about poop. Uh, theirs, not yours. Although I'm not judging...

I went to super WalMart w/ my nephew today. I've never been to a super WalMart before it's freakin huge! OMG I could not WAIT to get out of there! YOu are very brave!!

A friend of mine took her two-week old to Costco (a big superstore where everything is sold in bulk). She was trying, without much success, to get a bag of 30 rolls of toilet paper off a high shelf, and her daughter started crying in the stroller. All of a sudden, the baby stopped crying, and my friend looked over to find that some strange woman had STUCK HER FINGER IN THE BABY'S MOUTH TO SUCK ON.

The horror.

Her daughter is 3 now, and fine (of course), but I thought my friend was never going to get over it.

Hun you are in no way the worst mom. How could you be? You remembered to take them WITH you.

Case in piont...

Years ago when dino's roamed the earth, I was a tiny newborn babe.

My parents, God love them, needed to go to the store. So off they went with their little list of goodies to buy.

As they shopped both had the odd sensation they were forgetting something very important. They read the list over several times, all was there.

Finally they got to the section to buy baby formula. Baby formula? "OMG! The baby! We left the baby at home!"

Cart was abandoned, they rushed home to fine me sleeping in my bassinet, none the worse.

They forgot me.

It may not have bothered me then, but it does now. How the hell do you forget you have a baby? LMAO

Freaking hippies... :)

Nope, you aren't a bad mom at all.

PS. All my trips out with the twins ended with all three of us in tears for several months. It gets better though, I promise!

I remember having my first child and how it completely changed my life. I remember feeling how you did, that taking him out was a life threatening event, evils lurking everywhere... It must be the mothering instinct kicking in.

Hey, I went to an outdoor mall with my 3-week-old last fall. I swear the temp dropped about 20 degrees from the time I left my house to the time I got to the shopping center. But I had to run my errand - I was going to get my laptop fixed, and at that point, it was my one link to the world and sanity. So I threw a blanket over the poor kid's face and hoped for the best.

And of course I've forgotten to strap him in his carseat - twice. The second week after I went back to work. That was a great additional dose of guilt. You are an awesome mom. Really. And it's amazing what these kids can survive. =)

I am a bit embarrassed to confess...My daughter has fallen from our bed, from our embrace, from the changing table AND from the top of three stairs in a shop. Always head first, of course.

Lucky enough, it looks like the hardest part of her body.

Hey I have a 1 year old and an almost 3 year old, and most of our mall trips still end in tears--mine, not theirs! That is brave to venture out with newborn twins. You're doing a great job!! And it does get better.....

You can't possibly be the WWM -- I AM. And I don't even the excuse of not getting enough sleep or being a new mom or anything. Two months ago, I sent my 5-year-old and my 2-year-old to school and day care without coats or jackets, in summer clothing on a day when the temps dropped to 40 degrees!!

I swear when I checked the Weather Channel that morning, the forecast was for 70 degrees at least, but I was seriously mistaken.

Oh, wait. I can top my previous story of the blizzard.

I went down a full flight of stairs in my walker, landing on my head on the basement's cement floor.

My brain still works, but I have a BIG DENT ON THE TOP OF MY SKULL. When i have friends feel it i think they're looking for a divit. When they realize its' a good 3" in diameter, they totally freak out.

Frankly, I think it's amazing that I made it out of childhood, let alone though 25 years of formal education.

ahh, not to worry - you are far from stealing my glory as the Worlds Worst Mother. A few quick examples to prove my worthiness:
1.) My son received 2 head injuries in 10 days, one required stiches, one resulted in a concussion.
2.) My daughter swore at her grandma at the age of 2.
3.) Instead of caring for my sick daughter, I packed her off to grandmas so I wouldn't miss work.
4.) My son does not change his underwear every day, he does not remember to brush his teeth and he almost failed religion.
5.) I did not breast feed - I didn't even try.

The WWWM award is safely in my possession ;)

My SIL screamed at me, then she proceeded to ignore me for several months b/c I MADE UP a story in my blog about a woman I called Missus Bad Mother. If she read blogs and knew how many of us applied the Bad Mother name to ourselves, she would freak and ignore the 'net for a year...

I first went to a store w/ my new twins at 2 weeks and the mall at six weeks. Do what you need to do to keep your sanity and pack extra socks for the wee ones.


Oh, oh, oh, oh, I just remember what I did to my son in front of a social worker.

We were at the Social Services office (I was getting some assistance because of the ex hounding me) and my son was about 7 months old, and the social worker and I were standing at the front of the office. At the front was one of those gates, and I proceeded to shut the gate, not realizing my son's finger was in it.

He started to cry, but I ignored and shut the gate even more.

The social worker realized what happened and she didn't even bat an eye.

The kid lost his fingernail.

See, I am the WWM!!!!!!

The first time I tried to head out with Aidan, I got him all ready and in the car. Then I realized I had forgotten something essential (like his diaper bag or something, I don't remember what). I hadn't even sat down in the car, but that was enough to stress me out, and I took him right back out and went inside and stayed there.

And T, ALL of us have frozen and scorched our kids at one point or another. If that's the worst that happens, we're in great shape! (Except that it feels AWFUL when it's your baby.)

Oh yeah,

My father in law came home one sunny day in 1948 driving a NEW CAR!!! v. big event in those days. Grabbed wife, and they went for a giddy cruise around the neighborhood, until one of them remembered their 6 week old newborn son at home!!

You are doing just fine. I remember once forgetting the diaper wipes and we were both covered in shit from a diaper blowout. That was fun.
Note to Tertia: always keep extra diapers, wipes & clothes in the car for emergencies!!!
Also, Kate probably has a clogged tear duct (as stated above) Here's a link w/ info & how to care for her eye. Both my girls had the issue & we used the eye ointment (but the eyedrops are easier!!!)

I once spent an entire afternoon (5+) wondering was the matter with Seth (then just 3 months old). He wouldn't stop howling, no matter what I did. Finally I gave up and just let him lie on the couch howling while I tried to distract myself from wanting to SILENCE him (somehow! anyhow!) by watching TV.

Then I noticed ... I was wearing flannal pants, a long-sleeved shirt, a cardigan sweater, and had a blanket.

Seth was wearing a short-sleeve crotch-snapped shirt.

Guess which baby was cold and crying about it?? Bad momma.

Another story so you can feel better goes like this ... I'm a firm believer in "mom gets to take a shower," even if that means baby has to cry. I had left baby-Eli on the carpetted part of the upstairs hall, with the locked-in baby gate blocking the stairs.

He cried and cried while I was in the shower, but I just continued washing my hair. He howled through the whole shower.

Bad mom moment ... when I came out of the shower, he had somehow shuffled himself backwards underneath the bottom of the baby gate (which was installed correctly) and was hanging BY HIS HEAD down the stairs. Yikes.

My first outing with my first baby was the mall too. I remember trying to get to the other side of the food court, Ben in my arms screaming bloody murder, trying to push the carriage while holding him, everyone staring at me. Yes, trauma at the mall.

Been there, done that. Which is why I stopped venturing out of the house, period. In fact, the other day, my DH said to me, "Our son is not a mole. He can't live underground in the dark." So, it turns out I am also the WWM by trying to protect him, too!

But a first outing to a mall - you took a lot on your plate! I am impressed - you'll be so glad you got out, and the first time is the hardest. You're a lot gamer than I ever was. And you're doing a WONDERFUL job. You really are. I take my hat off to you, completely and truly.

Heh! Bad mother moments:

Finished nursing my 10-day old daughter and was sitting on the sofa with her - she was nested in the boppy and I was watching some TV. The cats are chasing each other around the living room. Cat 1 jumped onto the back of the sofa and races for the hall. Cat 2 leaps... onto the boppy. Flips the boppy up, depositing sleeping baby face-first onto the floor.

Two days later, I trimmed off a bit of her skin attempting to trim her nails down.

Three days after that, first bath (well, sink bath, instead of just wiped off). After washing her off, I go to take her out of the little baby tub (resting in the kitchen sink) and wonk her head on the cabinet above the sink and cut her forehead.

(skip ahead a few months)

Taking a nap on our king sized bed, put daughter in middle of bed, I curl up on one side of her. Wake up from sound sleep by daughter, who has managed to crawl/roll/something out of bed and is - you guessed it - face down on the floor.

Amazing that she's still cute as a button, as many times as she's bonked her face.

Oh, I know we all have our WWM moments! Mine was actually two moments within the space of about two days. My daughter was about two or three months old. I suddenly decided, five minutes before she had to leave for day care in the morning with her daddy, that her nails absolutely needed to be cut. This was before I had developed any baby-nail-cutting skills whatsoever, and since I was in a rush, I wasn't very careful. Her piercing shriek alerted me to the gigantic slice I made into her thumb with the baby nail clipper! My husband came in, furious, scooped her up and covered it up with a bandaid. I was banned from cutting her nails again for about a year. He would not let me near her.

And that alone would be enough, except for two days later, I drew her a bath. I checked the water temperature when I turned it on, but neglected to check it after the tub was full. It was my husband's turn to bathe her, and he set her in the baby tub. He had her cradled in both hands, and the instant his hands hit the water, she let out another one of those now-familiar piercing screams, because the water was waaaaaay too hot. He yelled at me, "Didn't you check the water?!!!!!" He immediately pulled her out of the water, but he wasn't fast enough to keep her back and the backs of her legs from being immersed. She was screaming and her skin was bright red. If he hadn't pulled her out that quickly, she might have been scalded. He was livid. It also took a lot longer to calm her down after that experience than it did with the nail thing.

I was definitely the world's worst mother that week. Mommies make mistakes! You're doing great.

When my son was 4 weeks old, I sent my husband out for an hour for himself. The second he got back, after darling son had screamed for the entire hour, I said (possibly crying hysterically, but too tired to remember) "Please just take him so I can brush my teeth." The next sound in the house was my husband falling down the stairs with babe in arms and a sickening splat as said son landed face first on the hardwood floor. Then silence. Then anguished yell from husband. Then, finally, cries from baby.

Called paramedics, and left son lying on floor in case he was irreparably broken (although snuggled him too.) Paramedics came in with a woosh of cold air on the floor where baby lay as was -53*C that night. Took him to hospital where he was pronounced the "Flying Scott" (Scott is his name). Was cautioned by doctor not to let this happen too often as babies are quite resilient, but only to a point, you know.

Just wanted to let you know, along with others before me, that you will always feel like the WWM, but someone will always have a worse story to tell!

P.S. Scott is now 13 months and seems quite bright despite head injury at tender age of 4 weeks and then several more as he learned to stand up and balance. We're not sure if the piano lessons will stick, though.


I was an overprotective nervous wreck when we had our first daughter 12 years ago. After several weeks of claustrophobic isolation, I was told in no uncertain terms by our dear 56-year-old Scottish friend (father of six) to get out of the house and start learning how to make the baby part of our normal lives. I will never forget him saying with a twinkle in his eye, "Ye know, they're rrrrally verra hard ta keel!" He was right.

A tip I was given to protect my preemie twins from germs from other people's dirty hands and sneezing when you take them out: put one of those fabric sunshades on the buggy which covers the buggy. I think ours is called a mountain buggy sunshade. It is also useful when the babies want to sleep while you are out, as you can pull the extra layer down and block out the light.

ps - We did the same thing on our first walk with our tiny boys. Couldn't work out why they kept crying until I happened to feel one of their hands and he was freezing cold! Once we put their hats, gloves and an extra laying on, the crying stopped - funny that. We thought 'poor babies having such a pair of amateurs for parents'!

If that is the worst you do, you are so, so far away from being the world's worst mother. When my oldest was but 8 days old, I was so tired that I fell asleep nursing him on the couch. We both woke up to him crying because he rolled off my lap and onto the floor. Thank God our couch was really low to the ground.

World's Worst Mother - nope.
World's Bravest Mother - you bet!
You actually got organised enough to take newborn twins to the mall BY YOURSELF and you call yourself a bad mother...I don't think so.
I took Mike to the plaza aka mall at three weeks old, with my husband, and cried the whole time because it was too much. I think the poor little tyke was about three months old before I went out with him again, but certainly not on my own. Here is your big tick and a kookaburra stamp for effort; a lollipop for bravery, and if you look closely, there's me taking my hat off to you. Go girl!

I think if you're actually worrying about being the World's Worst Mother, it's a pretty safe bet that you're far from it!

When my son was Adam and Kate's age, I considered it a good day when I got a shower and fixed something to eat besides a bowl of cold cereal. (Who am I kidding? I *still* consider that a good day and he's 2½ years old now!)

I'm finally delurking after months of reading your (and everyone else's blogs)! The kiddies are just precious btw. You are such a good mom to even attempt to take them out. I am cracking up over the stories! Here's a few of mine:

3 days before my sons 1st birthday party,(immediately after my 2nd IUI of round 2) I whacked his head into the car while putting him in his car seat. Off to the ER for 3 stitches while I was hysterical. The pictures are cute with the black suture sticking out. He can now point to his eye and say mommy gave me booboo.

Last March, he was about 1.5, and we went to the local ER 3 times in 4 weeks. I couldn't figure out why he was screaming like a banshee all night and wouldn't lie down. Turns out he had 104 fever with a double ear infection. Whoops!

It came back 2 weeks later! You would have thought I learned. Obviously not.

Then, to complete the month, he climbed up and fell backwards off a chair. Vomiting followed, and off we went to the ER to see if he had a concussion.

We are very popular at the ER now.

But more importantly you WWM, were they wearing GAP??

I was 7 days old when my parents opted to take me out for their yacht club's race night onboard their sailboat.

Lacking a proper child-restraining device, they plopped me into a laundry basket and tethered it to the cabin with bungee cords. Later, they would switch to a bucket in the cockpit, in the interest of allowing me some 'fresh sea air'.

I seriously doubt your accusations of being WWM.

The comments to this entry are closed.


  • Medsitters Au pairs

More Ads

| More


Bloggy Stuff

  • Living and Loving

  • SA Blog Awards Badge

  • Featured in Alltop

  • Page copy protected against web site content infringement by Copyscape

  • RSS Feed
Blog powered by Typepad
This is the Reviews Design