That damn TV

Ok, I will admit I am slightly odd (some would say very).  I don’t like going to see movies or watching DVD’s.  I cannot ‘escape’ into the movie.  I know it’s not real, I can’t pretend otherwise.  I also find movies too prescriptive.  Listen to this fucked up logic of mine.  I prefer reading because *I* decide what the characters look like, what the scenery looks like, reading is engaging, interactive, it is participatory.  I can escape into the story, I admire the brilliance of the author's art to engage my interest and my mind.  When you watch a movie the director/producer/whoever tells you who the character is, what they look like.  That isn’t xxxx (character in the story), it is Brad Pitt, pretending to be xxx.  See, I can’t get past that.  Told you I was odd.

So you can imagine how much I love TV, NOT!!  I hate TV, it is lazy, boring, waste of time stuff.  The whole 14 weeks I was on bedrest I never switched the TV on.  When Marko goes away the TV stays off, blissful silence.  That damn TV is so intrusive.  I hate it.  I do watch sometimes, when every thing else has been done (i.e. chores) and there is nothing else to do, but I will watch CNN, Sky etc, or sports. Another odd thing about me, I love watching sport on TV.  Oh and I will watch reality TV like Idols, Survivor etc.  Does that make me trashy odd?

However.  Marko LOVES that effin TV, and it drives me nuts. I cannot understand how someone can spend their entire weekend sitting in front of the TV.  I want to do things, chores, tidy up the cupboards, fix things, build things, DO THINGS.  And yet I know for some people, and apparently many males, sitting in front of the TV is their way of relaxing, unwinding after a hectic work week. 

It works terribly on my nerves.  By Sunday night I am in a bad mood and a real bitch to Marko.  I just find it such a waste of time.  To me life is too short to be watching TV, but I suppose he could say life is too short to be doing chores all weekend.  I love chores!  Chores are useful, you get things done.  I can’t do nothing, I will go mad.

Help me understand the TV thing.  What is it about TV that is so attractive? It must be genetic though cos every time we go to the in laws the TV is on from morning till night.  It drives me insane.

Hmm, reading this I do sound a bit hyper don’t I.  Actually, I must be a huge pain to live with, haha.  Thank god I am G&D or else Marko would have dumped me long ago for a quieter, more obedient model.  And probably younger and lower mileage.  At least I am consistent.  Consistently odd that is.

Still hate the TV though.  Stupid thing.

NOTE:  I did go see a movie on Saturday, first time in about three years.  I went to go see Meet the Fockers because my mother had said that Robert de Niro’s character was exactly like my dad and she was right.  Silly movie, but it was true, my dad does look and act exactly like Robert’s character!  Ha ha.  (Mother had Adam, Rose had Kate.  I decided to spend quality time with husband.  V good wife. T = winner.)

Comments

[Melany]

I'm not a huge fan of TV either. I love watching reality TV types, also Oprah. I'm with you on the movies though. I really really battle to get myself into a movie. That's why I think I can watch cartoon-type movies with the kids. I don't even have to try and get involved in the movie - can't feel like I'm "in" the movie...it's only a cartoon. Nah.. you aren't that crazy! I'd much rather read blogs than watch TV LOL

[Tatiana]

Yay! I can post, noone else did! (Using computer at work and normally can't post a comment because of all your friendly !@#$%^&* remarks, that are banned by my employers)
HATE TV, always did, always will! That thing was broken, and for the whole month I could enjoy the silence. But my daughter pressurised and here we are with a TV again...

[nadia]

ha-ha Tertia, that's EXACTLY how I feel too. Hate the TV. Biggest waste of time, EVER. So very unproductive. The moment my feet enter through our house's door, I start doing things, chores, crafty project, reading. I'm never not doing something. Husband, although not a TV fan, is an internet junky. Surfs the internet for 8 hours non stop sometimes. If I don't feed him liquid and food during this time he'll dry up and shrivel surfing the internet. That's his thing though, just as doing chores is mine. Was difficut (and still is sometimes) to accept it.

was nice reading your view on this!

[Meredith]

My husband tried to convince me this evening that it was a good idea to get a tv for our bedroom. Um, I'm not that much of a sucker. I don't get the addiction either. Cartoons are the worst for me because they aren't even real people. It's a lazy habit in my mind. However, I can lose countless hours on the computer reading blogs. Is that any better?

[Graeme]

Chores? You're a sick woman. Tsk tsk. :)

I worked out that based on the cost of the annual TV licence, and the amount of TV I watch, last year it cost me R10 per hour (only because I watched the JAG TV series). We watch DVDs almost exclusively, but that's because Michaela and I are movie nuts (her much more than me).

[tess]

but did you watch THE AMAZING RACE when it went to south africa in season 7? i was looking for a G&D...where were you? did anyone else think about tertia when AR went to SA??

i am a reader not a television gal, although for six feet under, AR, and arrested development, i am "so there".

xoxoxo tess

[Beret]

Well I must admit I love TV. After my tasks are done (and sometimes as a break in between) I enjoy sitting down to The Amazing Race, Survivor, Nip/Tuck, FoxNews, A Baby Story (blush), anything on Discovery Health, and my all-time favorite indulgence: ER.

I'm still getting up in the night with William, my 6 week old infant. If it were not for the tv I think I'd fall asleep on top of him!

I consider myself an ambitious person. My house is clean, my chores get done. I have hobbies and love to go running at night after my husband gets home. Still, I love my TV!

[Boulder]

Ok. I'll admit it. I'm a TV slut. A real ho. I LOVE TV.

I like the noise. It is a companion. I have it on all the time, but not really watching it. Just noise - like others do with music. Music rocks too, but that is more a car thing or too lazy to turn on the TV, so play on my computer thing.

About TV - Tertia & I have had this discussion before - I'm a Tivo addict. I've had it since 1999. I've had it so long, I have a grandfathered rate. My first one finally died this year, and I thought I'd never survive while we tried to plan which night to go get a new one. My new one rocks. I can program it in the house, or over the internet, so if I'm away and hear about something I can log on to any computer and tell it to record it. I can move shows to my computer and take them with me to watch someplace else.

Tivo changed my life. I think I should have trademarked that line because I hear everyone using it & I INVENTED the line people. I used to be a slave to things like wanting to be home to see Friends on a Thursday night, or 20/20 on Friday night, etc. Not anymore. Just Tivo it. 30min show is now only about 18 minutes of my life. Idol? Zip right through a crap performance & all the commercials. Save it for the next night, so if surprise when someone is voted off - I can go back & review it again. That stupid 30 minutes of fluff while they get to the one going home? Zip past it & straight to the 3, then 2, bam I know who is going home.

And sports on Tivo are fantastic. Go back & slow-mo for ourselves. No more having to stay home to watch something live. Can go out & enjoy ourselves and then sit back & watch it later in a day or whatever.

R.O.C.K.S.

So you see, I can get the chores done, and then when I feel like it watch something I like when I want at a faster pace - like speed reading, but for TV.

But I'm also a huge reader, and completely understand what you are writing about re: deciding what people look like, etc. I do the same thing & rarely go to a movie made from a book I've liked. Just can't do on film what my mind can.

Tertia, do you like animation though? Like Monsters, Inc, or Toy Story, or The Incredibles or Shrek? I love those. The adult humor that is above the kids' heads. Will go see those anyday.

Very interesting post....

[Larissa]

T - I am so with you on the TV thing. While I'm not QUITE as vehement about it, I also view it as a total time-waster and brain-sucker. And my husband sits there most weekends watching sports, sometimes all day long (when he's not out playing in boats or on skiis, which he prefers to most everything). Meanwhile, like you, I've got my "list" going of all the things I plan to accomplish that day, and I'm scurrying around GETTING THINGS DONE. Sometimes I'll try to sit with him for a while just to be sociable, but I'm so bored that it never lasts more than a few minutes. Luckily, his TV watching habits seem to cycle, depending on whatever sport is in season - but peak football season? Forget it. I used to get annoyed by it, but I decided that I wasn't going to change him and at least he was at home, and now it's just sort of comfortable that we can each do what we want to do, separate but side-by-side.

[Ariella]

Delurking to say that I haven't had a TV for the last three years (I am in the States) and that I feel the better for it. Terrible waste of time (just like the internet, but I could never live without that) and totally irredeemable. We do watch movies sometimes on the computer though.

If I had to hazard a guess about people who watch TV a lot, it's probably that it is an escape from the outside world. I doubt that it's "news getting" like it used to be in the 50s... or at least I hope it's not because the TV media is as biased as they come.

[deborah]

Like Boulder, I'm another TV whore. It's always on at my house, even if I'm not actively watching it. Kind of like white noise in the background.

I don't try to pretend that TV is stimulating or productive. Rather, it's simply a way to veg out and "turn off" my brain (which, sadly, has a tendency to think too much).

[Christel]

I like watching TV... I like reading and I like the internet. I love movies.... *I* had to convince my husband to get us a TV for our bedroom and on a cold night it is so lovely to cuddle and laugh at Will and Grace

[BeckiK]

I hate the t.v. too. We have a few favorite prime time shows that we watch a couple nights a week and we rent movies but I hate daytime t.v. with all the talk shows. I agree its a waste of time; especially now that spring is here and summer's on its way. I'd rather be outside playing in the earth or with my son. When I sit in front of the t.v. for more than an hour, I feel lazy and antsy. We vow that our son will never own a video game set. I think its a great thing that Kate and Adam won't be sitting in front of the t.v. as they grow up. Good Mommy!

[Carrie]

I love TV ... but I pretty much only watch comedies. Also for some inexplicable reason I like the Law and Order shows and CSI. Don't normally do police shows but those I'm hooked on. I think it's because the ones I watch generally have a good story. Love a good story. And anything that makes me laugh is a good thing. I probably watch TV one or two nights a week, so it's not a huge problem. I hope! I try not to have it on with the kiddo around.

[Sheri]

Good question! I can't really say I hate TV, I guess I don't care one way or the other. I don't turn it on my hubby does. He loves tv and will watch anything. It drives me nuts the way he will channel surf, start to watch something, a commercial comes on and he's on to the next channel. Wha?? what about that show we were just watching? So...while he's flicking channels, I"m either knitting or reading or on the laptop in the same room - but tuning the tv out.

If I do watch anything, it's usually something on History, Discovery or the Learning Channel and we watch Deadwood on HBO. I worked 16 years for the local cable company and have had all the tv I can stand.

[VHMPrincess]

I ADORE the TV...I could watch it all the time. My husband could take it or leave it, even sports. He'd rather be playing w/son.

I watch tons of stuff: talk shows, reality tv, home improvement shows, etc. I do have TIVO (three actually) so I record everything and then watch when I have time (like after the chores are done!)...but trust me, if son is in bed and chores are done, I'm PLANTED in front of it. Esp. reality tv is so fascinating to see what people really do in situations, it's like being super-nosey and getting to actually see into their lives for just a bit.

I love to read too, tons of reading, but not lately -with a job and the son, my brain is just ready for the ease of TV entertainment.

[Jaime]

It sounds like a match made in heaven to me! YOu like chores, he gets to watch TV while you do them!

I think my husband would like to have your model...hahaha!

[danigirl]

Hate TV? Sputter sputter... how can anyone hate wonderful and benevolent TV? Unlike demanding friends who expect conversation and interaction, TV is best and most understanding when you are at your drool-spooling stupidest. All you have to do is stare and breathe, which is about all I can manage after putting the boys to bed.

I read once that the TV is the hearth of the modern home, and I can totally see that. I do try to limit how often it is on when the boys are around (they are 3 and 1) and when they watch it's either commercial-free kid's programming on public TV or DVDs like Bob the Builder and Blues Clues. But I'll be happily hypocritical and admit that as soon as they are out of the way, TV rules the roost. I wish I had your energy!

[jennifer]

Another TV hater here!
OK, I'll admit, I have my shows that I have to watch (Alias, 24, Amazing Race) and some that I'd watch if nothing else was on (ER) BUUUT! I'd MUCH rather be doing chores or building things like you said! We built this house 4 yrs ago and have SO much 'building' left to do!
My husband on the other hand LOVES to watch TV. He would watch it any second of the day. He crawls out of bed and the TV goes on! HATE it!
I finally got rid of the TV that was available during dinner time so now I know at least during dinner there will be NO TV!
Right on Tertia!

[kam]

I hate the idiot box, too, but for different reasons. I get sucked in, and can't turn it off. Even junk.

And DH is the same sorry addictive-type. When Meg was a few weeks old, I walked out of the shower to hear her screaming. DH was sitting in front of the TV watching a political debate panel with a screaming baby in his lap--apparently oblivious. I decided right then and there that there was going to be no TV on while Meg was awake. We've stuck to it for three years, and I'm so glad. Now I catch glimpses of what's on when we're out, and I can't believe I just poured that stuff into my brain. *guilty shame*

Maybe you ought to start quietly playing John Prine's "Spanish Pipe Dream" insidiously in the background when M is home.

{insert gorgeous American twang here}
"Blow up yer TV.
Throw away your paper.
Move to the country,
Build you a home.
Have a lot of children.
Raise 'em on peaches.
Try and find freedom
On your own."

[Cory]

I LUV TV! Although, I find that I have a lot less time to watch now that we have a little one. What with us working during the day, (and sending our son to be raised by someone else for those 8.5 hours - bad parents!) the evenings are centered around playing and tending to his needs.

My husband and I are sort of opposite you and Marko though. He is the active type, I'm the veg in front of tv type. He has a few shows he likes, but thankfully he's not a sports addict. I watch far more tv than he does.

Although, I am an avid reader as well. I find escape in both things, just in different ways.

[Kam]

Errh, is it "Jesus on yer own?" Whatever.

[Debe]

My dh is the same way, drives me batty. He'll stand there, watching a damn commercial, mezmeriezed by the flashing lights and I have to forceably remove him from the room or turn of the tv to get him to move. I'm thinking of hiding the remote or forgetting to pack the tv when we move

[Kate]

Meet the Fockers, huh? I was excited to see that, because I enjoyed Meet the Parents. Then the chic is pg, but she didn't even test! OF COURSE SHE JUST KNOWS! ARGGGHHHH! And her fiance is a NURSE yet it never occurs to either of them to test. After that part, the movie sucked.

TV is just alright with me... :o)

[Libby]

Well, I like TV sometimes but I actually prefer movies. Movies I love. Netflix (online movie rental company) rules my house. Truth is that I really don't have much time to watch TV, with all the working full time and the kid and the chores, etc, etc. But I do have a couple of shows that I like to watch. I normally do not like reality TV, but I am a BIG Amazing Race fan. That is one the best shows on TV. And I am so happy to see other fans here on your blog! (hi Tess!). They went to South Africa this season and it was AMAZING! I was totally thinking about you Tertia! they actually had a task that involved interacting with "representatives" of the different tribes and your post about that came in very handy! They went to Soweto and Johanessburg. It was beautiful and the people were just fanatastic. So kind and friendly. I really loved it.

Anyway, my husband is just like Marko so I know what you are talking about.

[LPF]

Massive TV addict. I totally admit it. And since I became a SAHM, it's just become worse. The good thing with all of my addictions is that once I allow myself to wallow in them, I get bored. So I've burned through a bunch of shows and find daytime TV dreadful. We have two, yes, two TiVos, so I can at least maximize my TV watching time. It's escapism, pure and simple, but I do do other things while half-watching--this drives my DH crazy. I figure we all have vices and, as my dear sainted mother says when she's trying to defend her bad parenting, "At least I'm not a drunk or a junkie." I don't have the heart to tell her that might have made my childhood better. ;)

[Nicole]

I like Tv a lot better since we bought the Tivo. I used to watch it and feel guilty about all the time I was wasting. Now, I record what I want, and when I can find time I turn it on and zip through the crap parts. I still love watching too much though. HBO series are the best. My kids, on the other hand, watch wayyy too much and I know it's time to take a stand.

[buttercup]

DH and I have a love/hate relationship with the TV - there are certain shows we love, but we both get really grumpy if it's been on too long. When one of us decides to take control and shut if off, we both inevitable sigh,and say "Ahh, freedom!" It can really rope you in if you let it.

Twice in recent years we've gotten rid of it alltogether. Once for 10 months, and once for a full year. When DH brought the cable box back to the company, the woman asked his reason for returning it. He said "We've just decided we don't want TV anymore." She was all flustered because there was no such "option" to check on her form. She said "Well, let's just say the box is broken." That says a lot about us Americans and our love of the tube!

[Judy]

Okay, first of all you get big KUDOS for doing the date thing! oooh, I'm jealous! On the VERY rare occasion that we find someone to sit with both kids, it is always after 8 (after Tyler goes to sleep) and our "date" usually involves a shopping cart and a checkout line! NOT THAT MUCH FUN!

I can understand about the TV thing. I actually watch quite a bit of TV, but it is The Learning Channel, CNN, MSNBC, newsy things and crafty things. Rarely do I get into a show or TV movie unless it is animated and the 5 yo is screaming about watching it. Then, TV is vital to my sanity.

You are not alone - my dude is a TV junkie. I am waiting for the thing to break and then film his reaction. It will be priceless, like a man who just lost his best friend.

[buttercup]

Oh, and I second what Nicole said above. We recently got the "record" option (like Tivo) on our cable box, and now we watch only very specific shows, and can fast-forward through all the crappy commercials. Now I can barely stand to watch a commercial! It makes you very spoiled. Yes, HBO series do rock! Especially "Deadwood." That's the only show I think about ahead of time.

[Annie]

I, too, love tv. It's sad, actually. My husband could never watch and be fine, although he does like HBO shows, especially curb your enthusiasm. I was a huge Buffy/Angel fan and now I love Lost, Alias, Amazing Race and yes, I did think of you, Tertia the whole time. I guess Survivor airs there because there was a woman that totally helped AmRob out with their task. Love Rob. Love Lost. Love Buffy. Love Constantine. Bad addiction.
Anyway, not much help for you here except that I do try to limit what Sophia watches to PBS kids at this point or Maisy. And I don't watch during dinner and try to respect my husband's wish for music and quiet times too. It's all a compromise.

[Ninotchka]

We're TV people, I won't lie. But, like you, we watch mostly news and reality type shows and mostly in the evenings. I have some other favorite shows that I like to watch but I'm even inconsistent with them.

If my husband sat in front of the TV all weekend, I'd hate it too. Maybe as the kids get older, he'll want to get out more on the weekends going to the park, attending their sporting events, etc.

He sounds like good people so I wouldn't totally hold it against him.

My husband used to be a workaholic and would spend weekends at the office. Now THAT pissed me off. Now he's the regular weekend warrior going cycling, working on stuff around the house, etc. I do believe people are capable of change so don't give up on him just yet! :)

[becky]

Not to be too much of an anthropologist or anything, but I think TV really works well with the male brain. I don't know how many of you have noticed, but men watch TV TOTALLY differently than women do! Men almost always will just sit and stare, perhaps channel surf, but they get totally absorbed. Most women cannot just sit and watch TV. We need to also be folding laundry, sew, read, play with kids, etc.

I think guys need to sometimes turn their brain off, which is what TV allows you to do in an entertaining way. It is so absorbing for them, it's a kind of escape, a mini-vacation. My husband would be totally like Marko if we had a watchable TV. Because of that tendency, we made a decision long ago not to get cable, which means we get about 3 channels, none of which show anything too entertaining.

That said, there are some days after work where all I want to do is stare into space and unwind. Mind exhaustion feels like physical exhaustion, so doing chores DOES NOT SOUND LIKE FUN! I think you might be a little bit crazy in that way. Everybody's got different energy levels, and it sounds like you were blessed with more than your share of batteries!

I guess I'd encourage you to imagine how you'd feel if Marko bitched at you for doing chores all the time. What if he begged you not to do chores all weekend. It would make you crazy! That's how he probably feels about the TV - he just wants to do what helps him to wind down.

[LT]

I am equally addicted to books and to TV. My excuse is that I just love me a good story. I'll even settle for a not-so-good story if it comes to that. My husband claims that I also love TV because I was deprived of it as a child. (We had one of those TVs that required pliers in order to change the channel and even then it was public television or nothing.) Of course, I plan to be similarly cruel to my children!

[sheilah]

*blush* I am with Boulder...a TV ho', junkie, slut. Most of the time it is just background noise. I don't pay much attention to it; I am cleaning, playing with Evan, etc.

I also knit, sew, crochet, etc. while it is on. The crafty thing occupies my hands while the boob tube occupies my mind.

I hate, hate, HATE the reality TV crap (tho' this season I have been watching Idol...I had never even seen it before this year). I love to watch the Discovery channel, the History channel, etc. I love the science, history, biography stuff.

My husband hates that I watch so much TV tho' he is an internet junkie...will ignore Evan to play on the internet (I will NEVER ignore my son...).

[Amy]

I don't have cable so that limits the amound of TV I watch. When I had it I would often watch mindlesslly so when we moved I convinced my husband we didn't need it. So long we have held out a little over a year but he is missing his baseball and basketball so I think we will probably give in this year. We still have those old rabbit ears you never see anymore. I love a few shows on television - Lost, 24, all the HBO series which since we got rid of cable I have to wait for on DVD.

What is kind of ironic is that I work in Television. All of the shows I work on air on cable (history channel, A&E etc) so I never ever see them. My collegues think that is wierd but for me if I turn on a cable documentary it is not at all an escape from the work week but a reminder of it. I used to like those type of shows but I can't watch them anymore.

I LOVE Netflix though. I get so happy every time I see that little red envelope and get to see what movie we got.

[Mollie]

Why, I'm sure I don't know what you mean, dear T. Television? A waste of time? What??

Imagine lying on your deathbed and being told that you had spent TEN YEARS OR MORE of your life watching TV. TEN YEARS you could have been doing other things.

It's enough to make you unplug.

[Lily]

ok, now you know you have to do a post about your Dad now, right? does he like hold up memory cards in front of the babies and speak to them like they're adults?

[Ulli]

Okkkkkk, My husband would LOOOVE you! If i can choose between chores and watching something cool on the Animal Planet or some of my favorite shows that are silly and make me laugh, I will do the latter.....what does it do for me? I don't know really. I wouldnt' consider TV a "value added" to my life, but damn, when i am sick of reading books, and I hit those phases after a book reading frenzy, there are no decent magazines to read, I've called my good friends, I have already been on the treadmill, i am all alone with my puppy every night, heck, I take some Friends or Seinfeld or other fun shows.....makes me laugh, time passes....I go to bed.

[Kel]

TV slut too. Guilty. I work hard not to just turn it on for noise as it can suck me in too quickly. The 3 year old doesn't see much broadcast TV (its all PBS) and only videos to limit the amount of commericals. He will have to be in junior high and getting straight A's before he'll ever get one for his room.

We don't seem to have the time for Netflicks or videos (by the time he's in bed...) which I would love and do miss (are you nuts you don't like movies???)

What about B.I.G. with Tom Hanks, what about When Harry Met Sally, what about Gone With The Wind, American in Paris, Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, The Matrix, Bladerunner, Muriel's Wedding? Don't get me wrong, I usually don't like books translated into films (Beloved, oh my dear Beloved) with the possible exceptions of To Kill A Mockingbird, G.A.R.P., and Sophie's Choice. I could go on and on here.

I would love to try the no TV rule for a couple of months, but with the twins coming upon us soon, I know I'll need the idiot box to stare at during those 3:00 am feedings for my sanity and to give Nicholas something to do while I'm whatevering with his new sisters (yipes, I don't like the sound of that, but know it will be true).

Kel

[Stefanie]

We have at least 4 tvs in our house. I say at least because there may be one in the attic that dh is hiding in case one of the other ones dies.

I have my shows, reality and news mostly. The kids have their shows - cartoons. And dh has his shows - anything that is on if he is home. He loves tv. He sleeps w/the tv on when out of town.

And to reply about Amazing Race in SA - yes, I was looking for T too!

[stephanie]

I am exactly the same way when it comes to t.v. My husband can watch it for hours and it drives me crazy. It bothers me most when he watches it instead of playing with our son, who in turn bothers me while I am trying to get things done while his father is doing NOTHING. When he is not home our t.v. is almost never on. When he is on it is almost never off. I hate that my son is starting to pay attention to it sometimes. How could he not since his dad finds it so much more interesting than playing with him there must be something exciting on there.
Like you I would rather be reading.
Great post and no you are not at all odd only G&D

[victoria]

You mean Marko braved the fierce Robert de Niro character? He must be some kind of tough. ;-)

[Scully]

It's a terrible habit, but I usually have the tv on. I grew up with the tv and it's been a comfort to me all these years that I've lived alone.

I'm one of those people that reads and watches tv at the same time.

I tend to watch documentaries, a lot of British television (the period pieces, mysteries and comedies), the Food Network.

I adore movies but I prefer a book over a movie.

I'm not much help, but I think I understand your frustration. I know at times my son would rather stay inside and watch tv even though it's a nice day out. That bugs me.

And I adore watching sports on tv. Baseball, hockey, rugby, golf, football (soccer) and figure skating.

[Shelly]

I grew up without a TV and find it to be a waste of time too. However, My DH grew up with the TV on 24/7. He can remember ads and TV show themes, it is sick. We watch TV, but I don't watch very often. My boys watch it a bit too much, but what is a child to do when they are hooked up to a feeding pump and their schoolwork is finished and they can't read just yet?! He watches Disney movies and we do not watch much of the way of TV Shows.

[Sarah]

I'm for all things in moderation. I guess it's the definition of moderation my DH and I disagree on. On many occasions I have fantasized about cutting the plug on the damned tv. There is seldom a time in our house when tv isn't on, but I'm working on it. I like tv to be on only if someone is watching it. I think you should only watch it if there's something you want to watch on. I can't stand that DH sits in front of it for hours complaining that there's nothing good on, watching anyway. Then he complains that there aren't enough hours in the day to do what he wants to do. There'd be plenty of them if they weren't wasted sitting watching crap. It disturbs me that he is like a walking tv guide for what's on every channel we have during the day - I'm suspicious that the real reason he claims it's impossible to get anything done at home during the day is because of the tv, but I can't prove it.

What saves my sanity: if I walk through the room and see the tv on and no one watching it, I turn it off. I did manage to convince DH that we should quit paying for overpriced cable, so there's even fewer channels of crap to watch. I inisit it be turned off during mealtimes, even though we're not in the same room. (he'll eat and listen to tv instead of conversing) I find it's easier to keep the tv off after dinner if it's turned off during.

But what I hate most of all is how easily the demon box sucks me in and eats all my time, too.

[kat]

I'm a big fan of Tivo simply because I don't have to sit and waste hours. It records and I have the power of the remote.

I'm neither a TV lover or hater. I enjoy it for the shows I watch but I'm not about to throw my TV in the trash as well.

I think the appeal of TV is somewhat like a book except it requires less brain power. You can literally tune out to the TV.

[projgen]

I'm not a tv ho' but I'm certainly a tv zombie. I won't turn the box on, but if it's already on, I get sucked in and will watch for 3 hours. Fortunately, it doesn't go on during the daytime, so it's only my evenings that get sucked up, but still - it's my evenings!

I get no support from dh, because he loves the tv, and if I suggest that we play a game or something in the evening, I get a blank stare. The funny thing is, we both complain that there's nothing good on (we download most of the shows we really like, and then get sucked into the vortex when those shows are over) yet we watch. And watch. That said, we are fans of SuperNanny (we're hoping it's training for when, G-d willing, IVF works), Medium, Charmed, Desperate Housewives, and of course - Lost! We also watch Amazing Race, but it's starting to lose its appeal. We tried to cancel our cable, but it turns out our cable is tied into our neighbour's, and as long as he has cable, we have it too. No charge. Yeah, just what we want: free zombification. *sigh*

At the same time, we're both huge readers (I agree with T's comment that tv dishes it to you, reading allows you to create it for yourself). And I post too long in comments sections...

[sarah]

A mere month after we were married my husband bought a behemouth tv on credit (so we're paying for it about seven times over).

I do like dvds and movies but regular tv not. I agree with you about sports. I love soccer on tv. Which is a good thing because it's on almost 24 hours here.

It does seem to be a gender issue in many relationships? But not all.

[Kathy]

My TV is always on -- but don't ask me WHAT's on -- it is there for background noise. I guess I got used to it when I was married. My ex is a big-time TV addict. He would watch TV, I would read or do needlework, or whatever. I got so used to it being on that it's just too quiet with it off.

[m]

Kam, it is "find Jesus." I would never have expected to see a John Prine lyrics here! Love the song but couldn't live it. Must have TV. Sad but true.

[usako]

I think it's genetic, as well: my family loves the tv (so do I), but my partner's family never really had one, or when they did, never really watched much of it. So I'm the one on the couch for an hour or two most days, and he's on his computer (any difference tho?).

I must admit tho, he is changing, and right now we're both unemployed and all too often i'll emerge from my office where i'm jobhunting, to find him watching sports or home&garden shows... yikes!

I do wish i had more of the 'love chores!' than the 'love tv!' bits in me, tho.

[Crystal]

If you think you're odd, listen to this: I read *while* watching TV. Neither is enough to keep me occupied, so I must do both at the same time. Boredom is absolutely the worst thing ever to me!

[Aimee]

My Mom used to ask my Dad if he wanted her to drill a hole in the TV. I'll let you figure out what the hole would be for...

Aimee

[Angela]

I have a love/hate relationship with the tv. I love the stuff I watch and I hate the stuff my husband watches. I love movies and I love to read as well although I have yet to see a movie where the movie was as good as the book. I am particularly addicted to "Lost" and "Desperate Housewives". I do agree though, that weekends are for "doing things" and not sitting in front of the idiot box and watching sport (so I tell my husband).

[21stCenturyMom]

I used to not like TV and that was much, much better. My kids got totally addicted to TV and watched without discretion. They stooped to watching infomercials if nothing else was on. I cancelled the cable which where I live means no TV. It was bliss. We were the TV-free family for years.

Last summer the cable company had a special and because of the Olympics and the Presidential election I decided to go for it. When the trial period, which included premium channels, was over I went to basic cable which has only a few channels. Now I have shows I must see! I hate myself. There are not many of them but enough so that by the end of the week I can count the wasted hours.

I think it's time to cancel again. Thanks for the reminder.

[Carrie Jo]

Tertia, you sound like my step mom. If I wanted to sit down and just space out for a bit she'd say to me "Isn't there something productive you could be doing right now?" But to me, relaxing was quite productive. I admit I am lazy. I HATE chores and love the fact that my husand is willing to do most of them. I like TV ok but I LOVE reading for the same resons you do. My husband likes the TV so he can veg in front of it and not have to think about anything deeper than who's scoring. If I ask him a philosophical question during this time he just looks at me like I'm crazy. We usually hae the TV on as background noise, but I'll happily turn the TV off if I'm reading a good book. If I'm just reading the newspaper or an article I got off the internet I'll keep the TV on though. I get bored easily while eating or doing other such mundane things so I like having something to entertain me.

[Toni]

You've inspired me, dear Tertia. I finally went to my beloved Tivo and deleted the season passes that make me want to waste my time in front of that boob tube. No more Desparate Housewifes. No more OC. No more L Word (although that one was getting GOOD). Waste of my time.

THANK YOU!! :)

[victoria]

This is not about today's post. Rather, it's about my moronic reaction to a post of a few days ago.

Tertia, you were generous enough to describe in some detail the class divide in SA. I left this breathless comment to the effect that "oh my gosh I had no idea it was sooo bad what can be done?"

I've realized what a stupid thing that was to say, when I live in a country horribly divided along class and race lines.

America is by no stretch of the imagination a truly free and equal country. Poor people here tend to stay poor. It is very very hard to break the cycle of poverty. The poor have less access to good schools, less access to good healthcare, less opportunity in general. A smaller fraction of our population faces severe poverty, but it's still widely present and very bad.

And it's true here too that black people are more likely to be poor than whites are, because poverty tends to reproduce itself and because racism is alive and well in my country.

I've never been to SA so I can't say whether the contrast is starker there.

How dare I be so clueless I don't know, I certainly have no excuse.

Anyway Tertia thank you for posting on controversial topics & making me think.

[arubagirl]

I love the tv. Or, I love certain shows that are on the tv (or were). I must be interested in the story, of course, and the writing and/or the acting must be good.
I love reality tv too, not all certainly, but I think that The Amazing Race, Survivor and The Apprentice are all produced on a pretty high standard. The contestants, now that's another story.

There IS intelligent stuff on tv out there, in my opinion, although I guess several people disagree with me.

[MollieBee]

Very cool of you to do the movie thing with Marko. I bet it was nice to be away from the chaos for a while.

[andrea]

Same here, I often sit reading my book while DH is glued to the TV

[Lou]

I know exactly how you feel. I enjoy a movie every once and a while. I could happily sit down to one once a week, as long as it has good characterization and plot. And I don't like pretty boy actors liek Brad Pitt very often. The realer the better. I actually really dislike tv. We don't even get any channels because it just isn't worth it to me to get cable or an antenna. We watch dvds.

My boys are complete opposite though. They would gladly have the boob tube on all of the time ( and do) Men can only focus on one thing at a time so if the tv is on they focus on that an dforget about everyt5hing else. When I watch I still have everything from the entire day gnawing at my conscience. That's just how I am wired. I love to be doing something productive. MOst of the time when I have a movie on I am scrapbooking or cleaning or doing something else. I just can't sit there!

I've realy enjoyed reading your blog for the past few months :-) Thanks!

[beck]

Ha. Can't help you there... I don't watch ANY TV and just don't get why people would want (and even look FORWARD) to waste so much time staring at a box that's full of fake people with fake lives.

[Adelaide]

What do you like to read?

[sharbean]

I hate everything about TV -- especially the commercials. I don't know what the commercials are like in South Africa but here they piss me off so much that I don't watch TV. Computers are the time waster in this house.

[projgen]

Regarding what the person who said there are intelligent things on tv: yes, indeed there absolutely are. And I take advantage of them every chance I get (I love Scientific American Frontiers - forgot to add that to my list!). But what freaks me out is a study I read a little while back that watching tv actually sends your brain cells into a state of "shutdown" (for lack of a better, scientific term on my part). Brain activity is reduced during tv watching even more than when you are asleep. So, watching tv actually does make a person stupid.

The article didn't talk about long-term effects though - when the show is over, does the viewer stay stupid? ;)

[Cherith]

Hey Tertia, have not posted in a while, much trauma in my world.

Have not even had a chance to read much but saw this one and had to pop on (off?).

H-A-T-E the TV. Could easily live without one. We have ONE in our house, will never have more and do not care if this one breaks.

I think that TV has completely ruined the art of conversation. That is why so many Americans are so stupid. Too many of us sit and watch someone else tell us what to think, rather than coming up with our own opinions. Pathetic. I know that I sound bitchy, but I HATE that thing. We don't watch it, even my kids are not into it. I love that. They are not constantly asking me for this thing or that thing that they saw on a commercial. Instead they are running around playing and imagining and pretending...what kids are SUPPOSED to be doing.